I don’t know if Ash’s article about The Dream was ever actually posted on this website. Maybe it was and you read it before everything was lost in the hack. I’ve seen it. I might end up posting it myself. It deserves to be out there, even if common sense and common decency demands it stay buried. It was probably one of the only things he ever wrote where he was being completely honest the entire time.

If you ever see it on this website and you haven’t read it yet, do yourself a favor and don’t. It’ll make you feel weird and uncomfortable, and then it gets lodged in your brain. It’s like an itch you can’t scratch. You feel it worming its way into your subconscious, and there’s nothing you can do to stop it. It’s torture.

Anyway…I had The Dream for the first time last night. It was exactly how he described it, yet completely different. I’m not going to start going around in those circles right now, but…yeah. I’ve been in Emerson Valley for almost two years, and I never had it. Then two weeks after blacking out and waking up in Blackwood Forest, it happens. I can’t help thinking the timing’s a bit too coincidental.

It shouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone that I hadn’t been to the forest before that. While I do enjoy nature, there have been way too many deaths and disappearances there for me to ever feel comfortable crossing its threshold. Marty going missing while camping there only confirmed my fears. And now this? It can’t just be a coincidence. The Dream has to be connected to it somehow.

I’m still exhausted, but I’m dreading going back to sleep. I know that once I close my eyes and drift off, I’m handing all control over to whatever’s being The Dream. You can’t stop it. You can’t fight it. You can’t even see it coming. Inevitably, your body will give out, and you’ll be back asleep. Delivered right back into its horrifying oblivion.

There’s a good chance my fears will be for nothing in the immediate future. My anxiety over going to sleep will be out of control for a few days, but I won’t have The Dream again. Things will settle down, and I’ll forget why I was so afraid to close my eyes. It’ll wait until I’ve been lulled into a false sense of security, and that’s when it’ll strike. Then I get to go through the whole thing all over again.

It’s funny in a depressing sort of way that even though we’ve all had to endure the having The Dream, yet everyone absolutely refuses to talk about it. You’re left with a feeling of crushing loneliness even though it’s probably the only experience we share across all walks of life in this town.

I really wish Ash was still here. I wish I hadn’t let other people’s opinions of him convince me to keep him at arm’s length. Maybe he really was as bad as they said, but at least I would’ve seen it for myself to confirm they were right. It’s too late for that now. Yet another regret to add to the pile.

At this point, I’m just rambling. I’m trying to put off going back to bed for as long as I can. You’re never more vulnerable than you are when you’re asleep. Usually you just have to worry about leaving yourself unprotected while you’re unconscious and completely oblivious to the dangers all around you. But The Dream attacks you from the inside. There’s nothing worse than being afraid of your own mind.

Hopefully with Christmas almost here, I’ll be able to distract myself with some holiday cheer. I’ve waited a bit too long to buy any decorations for my apartment. In all honestly, it’s still in a bit of disarray from when I moved in. There’s an embarrassing number of cardboard boxes that I still haven’t unpacked sitting around the place.

I guess I’d just gotten so used to moving every year or two. Why unpack when you know you’ll just have to box it all up again? I think that attitude has hurt me a lot. I avoid making friends (or trying to at least) and don’t get involved in anything since it doesn’t seem worth wasting the energy on. Getting attached to anyone or anything makes it so much harder once you’re forced to leave them behind.

I know my last foray out into the world didn’t end very well, but I haven’t fared much better cutting myself off from everything. I was fine during the pandemic because my life didn’t really change that much. How sad is that? Maybe it’s due to losing the only people I had regular interactions with, or maybe it’s just because I’m getting older, but I’ve been craving human contact. I want to talk to people, especially face-to-face. I want to start making up for everything I’ve missed by being alone.

I can feel myself starting to drift off. I just nodded off at my computer in the middle of typing this. There’s no more putting it off. As soon as I post this, I’m waving the white flag of surrender and going back to bed.

-Quinn Paxton, Acting Editor-in-Chief, Emerson Valley Gazette

EDITOR’S NOTE (12/21/2025 @ 2:27 PM): I had to come back to edit this article, because in my sleep-deprived stupor, I forgot to give it a title.