Earlier this evening, diners at Marco’s Bistro were treated to a show in the form of two Emerson Valley Gazette reporters having a violent brawn in the restaurant. New editor-in-chief Martin Fitzgerald was having dinner with his wife Lynn when human interest reporter William Cooper stormed in and began shouting at his coworker.

“I could barely hear what he was saying,” said Mr. Fitzgerald. “His eyes were bulging out of his head and his face was beet red. I’m not a rough-and-tumble guy, but the moment I thought he might hurt my wife, I jumped into action.”

Mr. Fitzgerald reportedly rose from his seat and exchanged heated words with Mr. Cooper. There are conflicting witness statements about who threw the first punch. In any case, a brawl broke out between them, sending the nearby table and all its contents crashing to the floor.

“It was scary,” said Dylan Schneider, who was celebrating his third anniversary with his husband Carl. “They looked like they wanted to kill each other. I don’t know what they were fighting about, but the bigger guy got the upper hand pretty fast.”

After tussling for a minute or two, Mr. Fitzgerald was able to pin Mr. Cooper to the ground. One witness who wishes to remain anonymous insists that things went a bit further before he and others stepped in to stop it. He claims that Mr. Fitzgerald had his hands around his coworker’s neck, “trying to strangle the life from him.” However, Mrs. Fitzgerald disputes these claims.

“No way. Absolutely not,” she told the Gazette when contacted about the anonymous witness’ statement. “Marty was holding Coop down to stop him from going crazy. His hands were never around Coop’s neck though. I don’t know why someone would say that.”

After the bystanders separated Mr. Fitzgerald and Mr. Cooper, the latter broke free and fled the scene. He was long gone by the time the police arrived.

“We’re currently searching for Mr. Cooper,” said Deputy Kevin Harrison. “He left the restaurant on foot, so he couldn’t have gotten far. At the moment, we’re considering him a danger to the public. If anyone sees Mr. Cooper, do not engage him. Call the sheriff’s department immediately and report it.”

With everything happening amongst the Gazette staff recently, it’s not a surprise that tempers are beginning to flare. Lifestyle reporter Ashton Rook was found dead earlier this year, and Sarah Donovan was killed last spring. The paper’s former editor-in-chief, Charles Donovan, has disappeared amidst a cloud of suspicion surrounding his wife’s murder.

“I don’t hate Coop,” Mr. Fitzgerald insisted. “I get why he’s so worked up. Things have been crazy since Sarah’s death. I mean, what’s next? How many tragedies can one newspaper take?”

As of now, no charges have been filed in connection to the fight. Mr. Fitzgerald has generously offered to pay for the damage to the restaurant, as well as the meals of everyone present.

“I’m just sorry we ruined their evening,” said Mr. Fitzgerald. “I’m the boss now, so I have to take responsibility for the members of my staff, even if one of them tracked me down during date night with my wife and attacked me.”

-Quinn Paxton, Local News, Emerson Valley Gazette